Marie Forleo introduction


I'm Avital.

You want a present, peaceful and playful family life? I'm here to help you make that a reality.

read more

How not to RUIN your Valentine’s Day

Worried about an unhappy Valentine? I feel you. If you’re in a committed relationship and have young kids, you might have felt that sharp decline in romance over the past few years (no, you’re not alone).



Disappointment, loneliness, and even big fat resentment can creep into our partnerships – and then, to add insult to injury, along come the romance-filled symbols of Valentine’s days and anniversaries.


It’s like they want us to feel bad about ourselves and our partners.

Valentine’s Day – or any cultural symbol of love – has a way of sabotaging unsuspecting marriages in the most private, dark corners of our hearts.

Today I’m sharing a live session I held a while back (want to get in on these, live? Join my group here) in which I’ll offer three questions you should be asking yourself in order to transform Valentine’s day from the Hallmark-Hollywood-Fast-Romance-Frenzy it’s become to the nutrient-rich romantic diet, you deserve.

Valentine's Day has a way of sabotaging unsuspecting marriages in the most private, dark corners of our hearts.via @ParentingJunkieTweet This


Because, honestly, so often these “symbols” and “shoulds” of connection and romance are nothing but deep-fries and slimy hot dogs – they might “fill us up” but they don’t sustain us. They’re like placeholders for true, deep connection – the type that heals our childhood wounds and elevates our consciousness. The type that offers real, unconditional acceptance, and teaches us humility, grace and compassion (to ourselves, first and foremost).


I’m willing to bet you’re harboring quite a few “shoulds” about your partner. Any of these ring a bell?:


  • S/He SHOULD give me more attention.
  • S/He SHOULD be a better listener.
  • S/He SHOULD be a better parent.
  • S/He SHOULD be more romantic.
  • S/He SHOULD apologize.
  • S/He SHOULD surprise me.
  • S/He SHOULD appreciate me more.
  • S/He SHOULD value me more.
  • S/He SHOULD express love more.
  • S/He SHOULD buy more gifts.


Yada, yada, yada… I do not for ONE MINUTE minimize these fantasies and wishes. I hold them myself, daily. We’re very much in the same boat if you feel ‘let down’ or disappointed from time to time in what your partnerships “SHOULD” be and isn’t. BUT, through self exploration, study, therapy and meditation I’ve come to learn how my own mind is actually the one sabotaging my happiness in my relationship.


If you’re curious about why that might be, or how we might change it, grab your journal and start with these three questions:


  1. Whose ideas are you believing?
    We are all continuously sold ideas – from our families, friends and culture at large – about what marriage romance and relationships “should” be. About what it takes to make a “happy” or “good” marriage. About which boxes need to be ticked.The problem is that these are constructs, they’re fallacies and they’re gnawing away at the very authentic and real connection you have – by placing plastic, unrealistic and unworthy placards of ‘good relationships’ before our eyes.

    Instead: Get silent for a moment and connect to your own intuition about what it means, on the internal level, to feel connected to your partner.

  2. Who are you trying to control?
    When we have a list of predetermined “SHOULDS” we often engage in elaborate performances to contort our partner, and ourselves, into these molds that may or may not fit our truest needs. The fact is that trying to control another person is always doomed to fail – it’s impossible and is usually expressed through criticism or passive aggressive behavior. Whenever (yes whenever) you criticize someone by telling them they’re falling short, or aren’t enough, or don’t measure up or have disappointed you – you’re almost guaranteed to trigger their defensiveness. There is no happy ending to the control paradigm.Instead: Control your own self and your environment. Take matters into YOUR hands and become the powerful agent of creation that you are. Envision your ideal connection and request it, honestly, and create it inventively.
  3. What are you focusing on?
    What you focus on you attract more of. If you’re focusing on all the ways your real partner is not your fantasy partner – you can be sure to continue to experience disconnect and disappointment.Instead: I’d like to gift you something. Here it is: a pair of rose tinted glasses. Every time you’re with your partner, have these on, and they will pick up and highlight all the things there are to love about your man/gal.

Let’s also bust one big, ugly, hairy MYTH about relationships.

Here goes: It doesn’t take two to tango.

In the vast majority of cases, one person alone can create enough of a change to snowball the entire relationship in a new direction. If YOU want a certain vision for your relationship, YOU can make it happen – at least in large part by controlling the only two things you have some control over: yourself and your environment.


Take the first step to transforming your parenting partnership by filling out this 3-minute survey here.


Then, I’d love you to comment below with which one of these three questions was most powerful for you?

Want to be “in” on my live sessions? Do this:
1. Go to The Parenting Junkie FB Page
2. Click Following.
3 Click  next to Notifications.
4 Select All Live Posts
You may also like...

Create a marriage you LOVE with the partner you've got! ⁣

Parent in love to create family bliss.⁣

Are you joining us? We begin July 1st. Check out Parent In Love >> Link in bio @parentingjunkie ⁣

#parentinlove #peacefulpartnering #parentingtogether #mindfulmarriage #familybliss #loveparenting #loveparentingwithhim #loveparentingwithher

There's still time to slide right in! With just 24 hours left, all you need to do is sign up now (for $0)'ll have another 14 days to decide! #ParentInLove Link in bio @ParentingJunkie ( ...

Now look, we’re all tired of the over-inflated results that course creators are flaunting on the interwebs. We’re all suspicious of online courses actually delivering on all their bloated promises. So if you think, “Bah, just another expensive course I don’t need” - I feel you, I do. I take the same wary approach when buying new programs. ⁣

But that’s why I want to share real human beings from all walks of life who have actually been through this course and received meaningful and priceless renewals in their relationships. ⁣

Like Chelsea, who remarked: “When I joined Parent in Love, I was ready to give up on my marriage. Today, my marriage has had a complete overhaul! It's practically a different marriage altogether.”⁣

Or Tanya, who reported: "This course has ABSOLUTELY TRANSFORMED our marriage, our family life, and my own personal growth journey! We still fight, but the fights are fewer and we tend to make up quicker and in front of the kids now!"⁣

And here's what Jonna said: "I have tools that give me hope and I know how to start resolving our conflicts. I have started to notice how my own shift of thoughts changes the whole atmosphere in our home, not only between me and my hubby but with the kids also."⁣

Check out my IGTV for more amazing success stories.⁣

Parent In Love is a 6-month deep-dive online program that will transform your marriage from the inside out. ⁣

Check it out!⁣
LINK IN BIO @parentingjunkie ⁣

Ever find yourself waiting for your partner to change? Sometimes, it feels easier alone. ⁣

As much as you want and need the support - I know sometimes it can just feel easier to run your home on your own. ⁣

No one criticizing. ⁣
No one judging. ⁣
No one commenting. ⁣
No one watching. ⁣
No one adding to your to-do list with their needs.⁣
No one irritating you.⁣

Ah. Bliss. ⁣

But did you ever have these thoughts only to then think: "Yikes! That's not really what I want, is it? What's wrong with me? What's wrong with us!?"⁣

And what has waiting for your partner to change gotten you so far? ⁣

Stop waiting... ⁣

You deserve to have a happy marriage, and your kids deserve to have happy parents. ⁣

And don't wait on your partner, because the Parent In Love program is DESIGNED to be done alone - so that YOU can focus on what YOU can change: yourself.⁣

Your partner will necessarily be affected by the changes you make - because that's how relationships work, we're intertwined like that. ⁣

So TAKE A BREAK trying to change your partner right now, and finally, start to see some real transformation. ⁣

Psst... Your partner doesn't even have to KNOW you're doing the program - not that I'm suggesting you hide this from them, especially if you two are used to discussing financial investments you make - but I DO want you to know that many members have gone through Parent In Love WITHOUT letting their partners know about it. ⁣

And what happened? ⁣

Well, typically their partner would suddenly begin to NOTICE a profound (wonderful!) shift in their relationship and wonder "what's going on?!" ⁣

If you really want to take this program but you're struggling to work through their concerns, especially about the $ investment, I've provided scripts to help you have those important conversations with confidence. ⁣

Get the free Make It Happen PDF in the >>> FAQ >> (link in bio @parentingjunkie) #parentinlove

This error message is only visible to WordPress admins
There has been a problem with your Instagram Feed.
Add a Comment


One Reply to “What’s Sabotaging Your Marriage?”

  1. Thank you for this fresh counter cultural perspective on partnerships and taking responsibility. Totally resonates with me. For years, YEARS(!), my default has been to choose to buy into the unrealistic expectation and to choose suffering. No more! Over it!

Comments are closed.