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I'm Avital.

You want a present, peaceful and playful family life? I'm here to help you make that a reality.

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The Best Grit Tip

Recently I devoured Grit by Angela Duckworth.  Read it, go on, or at least watch her Ted talk.

Grit has become a “hype word” in recent years, especially in the parenting media. In a nutshell, gritty people have a passion that they persevere with over a long time, including overcoming obstacles. Gritty people stay the course, and they do so happily. Their fun is in the challenge, not in it’s avoidance.

Grit has been shown to improve people’s lives . Not only are grittier people more successful in the mainstream sense of fame and fortune, they’re also healthier and happier.

None of this makes them better people, of course, and sometimes I shudder at our obsession with the said mainstream success. Because to me, personally, kindness and compassion measure far higher on my goals-for-my-kids list. Nevertheless, couldn’t they potentially be both? Please?

So what’s the bottom line? Well, good news for peaceful parents here, because Angela Duckworth teaches that “wise parenting” is the style that produces the most grit. Wise parents are authoritative (not authoritarian), and simultaneously hold high expectations of their offspring, whilst still offering lots of support. The reason this style produces grittier kids is because children of this parenting style tend to strive to emulate their parents, seeing as their parents have retained their respect and adoration. Thus, gritty parents in this category, will have grittier kids, seeing as they’re more likely to follow suit.

But Angela gives us another “grit tip”. She says the best place to develop grit is in extra-curricular activities, because these are both interesting and challenging. (School, she reasons is challenging but not interesting. Hanging with friends may be interesting, but isn’t challenging. Activities that a kid chooses can be both).

So her approach is this… Choose one hard thing. It can be anything you want (in fact, it must be something you really want, or you’ll never persevere) and stick with it at least until a natural end point. That means the end of the season, the end of the year, or until tuition is paid. This rule makes it impossible to give up just because you had a hard day, but possible to give up when you’re really done and you’re no longer interested.

I found this interesting advice as someone who’s starting their unschooling journey. Because I’m always wondering, if I want my child’s education to be child-led, how do I help them develop follow-through. I thought this approach was a good middle ground. And because unschooling is basically all extra curricular (seeing as there’s no curriculum to begin with), it kind of works out perfectly. I hope.

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Can you have a sophisticated home even with little kids underfoot? Thoughts? ...

My view while I get some ish done. ⁣

Toddlers can be clingy, whiny, and annoying sometimes... but one thing's for sure: toddlers are designed to play. ⁣

The trick is... supporting their current stage and phase of play. ⁣

Parents are notorious for feeling dumbfounded when their 18-month-old doesn't play with ANY of their toys. "You have all these cool toys, why won't you play with them!?" Can you relate? ⁣

That's because, oftentimes, toddlers aren't engaging in make-believe (imagining scenes, building worlds) - but exploring their own world. ⁣

🌈 That's where sensory play comes in (think: dry beans or shaving cream in the bathtub)... ⁣
🌈 Developmental schemas (think: throwing objects or spinning dizzy)... ⁣
🌈 Moving to music (think: dancing or putting on a drum concert)... ⁣
🌈 Dressing up (think: trying on your shoes or transforming into a bear)... ⁣
🌈 Real-life pretend play (think: anything in your kitchen cabinets or nailing trim nails into corkboard). ⁣

Play may look different for a toddler than for an older child busy with Lego - but they can totally rock at it if we find ways to support their stages and phases of exploring their world, developing their fine and gross motor skills, and just being the little scientists that they are. ⁣

Just like they were compelled to crawl (in their good time), they are compelled, wired, and designed to PLAY.⁣
★ What's keeping your toddler busy? ⁣
Psst... Have you watched my new YouTube video about this? I'd love to hear your feedback! ⁣
#toddlerplay #independentplay #schemas #playmatters #childhoodunplugged #playisimportant #toddleractivites #peacefulparenting #intentionalmotherhood #simplicityparenting #mindfulparenting #toddleractivities #workingfromhome #getishdone #momof5 #momoftoddlers #momoftoddler #learningthroughplay

Are you stuck at home (still?) with a to-do list longer than the Great Wall of China and a toddler running circles around your feet? Trying to get stuff done with a toddler in tow is like slamming on the accelerator with the handbrake on... you end up spending a ton of energy, without getting anything done.⁣

Enter: Independent Play⁣

If we've hung out for any length of time, you know I’m a sucker for all things #independentlyplay. ⁣

In fact, not to toot my own horn, but it’s kind of what I’m famous for (if you call having more than 3 followers on Instagram famous😉). ⁣

Anyhoo - thanks to 5 awesome hacks I’ve picked up along the way I am managing to get some *ish* done while my 2.5-year-old occupies himself... and I want that for you too!⁣

With the #ReclaimPlay Challenge coming up and Present Play opening soon, boy! my team and I are hard at work cookin' up some amazing goodies for you. In other words, I am using these hacks like my business depends on it right now. Literally⁣

You'll want to head to the link in my bio @parentingjunkie to watch the FULL 12-minute VIDEO (or listen to it on the podcast 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 you get ish done), but here's the bullet point version:⁣

5 Ways to Occupy Your Toddler (while you get ish done)⁣
1. Sensory Play⁣
2. Movement⁣
3. Music⁣
4. Dress Up ⁣
5. Real-Life Pretend Play⁣

💬 If your child was occupied (screen-free) for 30 minutes... 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙙𝙤?⁣

Read a book? ⁣
Make some protein balls?⁣
Write that blog post you've been meaning to since last month?⁣

Tell me more in the comments below and tag someone you know who has a toddler at home!⁣
#toddleractivities #kidsactivities #invitationtoplay #independentplay #toddlerplay #momlife #workingfromhomemom #momof5 #momof5motivation #screenfree #screenfreeactivities #whilemommyworks #toddlerplayideas

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