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I'm Avital.

You want a present, peaceful and playful family life? I'm here to help you make that a reality.

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Should you tell your kids the truth about Santa or the tooth fairy? How about the “Elf On The Shelf”? I get asked questions about these and other traditions on a regular basis, and I thought I would round up some of my favorite conversations regarding these in this special holiday episode. 

  • [3:03] Some TPJ updates!
  • [11:06] Should we tell our kids the truth about Santa?
  • [11:59] I feel strongly that everything I tell my kids should be 100% the truth.
  • [13:18] You don’t have to bring it up, but if they ask, be honest.
  • [13:41] Soon your kids may ask you about serious matters, and they should not have any doubt that you’re being honest with them.
  • [15:08] Don’t avoid the game or ritual; but consider being 100% honest about it if your children ask if it’s real. 
  • [16:58] My thoughts on the “Elf On The Shelf” tradition.
  • [19:27] When children melt down, it’s because there’s an unmet need or our expectation isn’t developmentally appropriate.
  • [22:44] Our role isn’t to manipulate our children into good behavior. 
  • [23:30] This actually teaches them to only behave when they’re being watched, and doesn’t teach them empathy.
  • [27:03] How you can make it fun without the manipulation.
  • [29:56] A letter to our families.
  • [30:02] We may not like or approve of everything our family does, and they may not agree with the way we do things (or don’t do things). 
  • [30:40] Let’s reframe; they often do the things they do or say the things they say because they care about us!
  • [31:02] Let’s try to model what it looks like to be loving and accepting, even when people disagree with us.
  • [31:28] We shouldn’t let little annoyances come between us and the people we love (and who love us).
  • [31:55] Let’s focus on the gift of spending time together.

When you approach these issues with the mindset of a conscious and peaceful parent, you’ll find ways to enjoy the holidays and their traditions without the sometimes negative and harmful effects they may otherwise bring. 

If you enjoyed this episode and it inspired you in some way, I’d love to hear about your biggest takeaway. Take a selfie of you listening or a screenshot of the show, post it to Instagram stories, and tag me @parentingjunkie or feel free to DM me on Instagram, I try to reply to as many as I can!

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