How do you peacefully stop your child from hitting?
The scenario: Your child throws sand at another child
How to handle it:
Approach calmly and attend to the hurt child first.
If your child is close be sure to touch her as well while you attend to the hurt child
When the hurt child is being attended to coach your child through the problem
Remove your child if need be
Problem solve to help your child make a repair
If your child isn’t very upset you can connect and work through it without removing your child. If she is very upset it’s best to pick her up and take her elsewhere so you can focus on her without anyone else listening. It’s much easier on you to take your child elsewhere to talk.
You can make the apology before you remove your child. We’re so sorry that she threw sand at you. We hope you’re okay.
When with your child empathize and realize that she must have had a reason (in her mind) to do what she did. If you sit with her long enough and connect she’s going to have a reason for doing what she did.
Coach through to what happened to the other child and how that child must have felt. Remember when we talk to children about what someone else was thinking or feeling they gain empathy.
Help your child problem solve and brainstorm as to how she can make a repair.
If your child is too upset to apologize hold her with you while you apologize. Your child gets to see how it is done and is doing it with you even if she isn’t the one talking.
Overall, realize that people (including your child) don’t do bad things out of the blue. What is on that person’s heart? What has she been carrying around?
Is your child the one that has toys taken away from her at the park? If so checkout the peaceful parenting approach to what to do when another child hits your child here.
I would love to hear from you! Has your child ever hit or thrown something at another child? What did you find most difficult about handling the situation? What did you find was the easiest part to handle? Please leave your comments below or over in our (free & awesome) FB community Love Parenting with Avital.
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